Monday, December 12, 2011

Coming out of seclusion...

Hello friends. I want to take a moment to thank everyone, from the bottom of my heart, for the lovely, heartfelt words of support at my dad's passing. I thought I would get back into the swing of things much sooner, but it has taken more time than I expected.

I have thrown myself into work, trying to keep busy and stay focused. If I'm busy, I don't have time to think. Blogging makes me think. I have to think about things to write about, usually what is going in in my small little life. Dad is always in my thoughts it seems, and it's just been too hard to put into words what I've been feeling.

I want to apologize about the "Bad Case of Blogger's Block" post that showed up in November on my blog. Can you believe that that was a post I actually started over a year ago when I couldn't think of anything to blog about? I grabbed some photos from my computer, intending to eventually making it a coherent post and I scheduled it to go live the following year. I then forgot all about it and because I haven't blogged since August, I didn't realize it had gone live in its rough, non-verbal state.

So what have I been doing? Dealing with guilt of my dad having been in a nursing home/rehab facility, a place he did not want to be. Wishing I had done many things differently. Revisiting so many things and wishing I could go back in time and do some things differently which (in my mind) may have changed the outcome. Stress eating. God, have I been stress eating. I will be getting rid of my Weight Loss log on the sidebar because I've regained all the weight I'd worked so hard to lose. If I ever feel up to starting the weight loss journey again, I'll start a new log on my sidebar.

I'm still wearing dad's blue shirt. The one everyone said was "his" color. They were right. It's a beautiful shade of pale blue. The rhinestone brooch was my addition. I can say without any hesitation that my dad never sported the brooch when he wore this shirt.

When I take a break from transcribing, the shops, and/or trying to paint, I sometimes see these beauties in our neighborhood.

A friend called me last week to let me know they were in her yard, so you know I had to grab my camera and head down for a visit.

After having no tree at all last year, we decided to take a chance this year even though Baby is as crazy as ever. We didn't put any of our breakable ornaments on the tree which was a smart move because she's constantly batting at everything and trying to climb up or through the tree.

She's a very mischievous little cat and I'm certain she thinks the tree was solely put up for her amusement.

I have a feeling she will miss it come January.

Sweet Jarrett is also enjoying the tree. I think all the critters are excited that Santa will be bringing them some treats. They've been very, very good this year (yes, even Baby).

Our little Tiger, now 18, spends most of her time on Amanda's bed, laying next to the heating vent in my office/studio, or watching the world go by outside her window... Santa knows her favorite treats are Temptations and I'm sure he'll be leaving her a few different flavors.

(Baby watching for Santa)

I doubt I will be back before the holidays so I want to take this time to once again thank you ALL for your kindness and to wish you all a Merry Christmas!